[video]
I don’t know how to meet new people sober anymore.
“Waiting is the most important thing we can do for the ones we love, but it proves me one thing, as it goes… it can also change our mind.” — Sir Jomar’s status message on FB
PLANTS VS. ZOMBIES = THE COOLEST THING SINCE “THE” AVOCADO SHAKE.
the fact that you’re making me randomly pick out books in the bookstore about a man killing his ex-wife and another about a woman intentionally colliding with a truck after his husband asks for a divorce tells me this is not at all coincidental. I can’t believe it even crosses my mind DAILY to meet you again, perhaps when we’re a few years older and you’d be so dignified and out of this world but you’d kiss me again like a schoolboy and I’d get a stiff neck from trying to reach your odd-shaped head(maybe remnants of the pain I felt when you finally gave into dancing with me at hellprom). Ah yes, consummation at last. I’ll be honest! Thinking about it seems way more fulfilling than building up on what could potentially be my quote unquote heyday.
When I try to contact you, I am reminded of how unkind your heart has grown in a span of weeks though. But I still contact you because you might forget me when you’ve fooled around enough and accidentally skip the part where you find yourself crawling back to me. You don’t have to worry about me because the thought of having too many partners is revolting. I’ll settle for one. Two. Okay maybe three in the meantime. So that means I’ll still have plenty of young love in my heart for you! Aren’t you excited? Even amidst all of this, someday, if you willed it, you can take me back.
“You must be a long phase for me, Marcus Flutie.”
“The longest, Jessica Darling,” he replied.
Yes. Love has the longest arms.
thanks for the pre-birthday love (i can’t believe i’m 18 — so young) and for being my bestfriend and childhood friend (ha ha ha). btw, i do like your boyfriend contrary to what you think.
TAKING AWAY MY PLAGIARISM V-CARD.
I sincerely hope you guys all have better relationships with your moms than me.
“Today, my boyfriend and I were laying naked in my bed making out. All of a sudden, we hear “pop goes the weasel” outside my house. My boyfriend stops, looks directly at me, and excitedly says, “ICE CREAM MAN!” and proceeds to flip me over, grab his clothes, and run out of my room.” — FML
far too needy for my liking!